Questions I often ask myself—on motherhood.
Is there anything I cherish more than the sound of Jude’s laugh? (It reminds me of the baby Grinch, and I can’t get over it.)
How is it that I can be obsessed with someone this much, and yet still want to pull my hair out in frustration half the time I’m with him (like when he’s throwing food on the floor or trying to bite me or sticking his hands in the toilet or doing something else I’ve told him repeatedly not to do)?
Will I ever not be a flustered basket case of a person running around like a chicken with her head cut off, or is this just who I am now?
How much TV is too much TV? Like, after how many episodes of The Wiggles will his brain start to turn to mush?
Why won’t Jude just eat what I cook? Do I feed him too many snacks?
Would it be better if I didn’t work at all while he’s this young? Is he benefitting from part-time daycare/childcare, or is staying home with me 24/7 what’s best for him right now?
Should we be flossing his teeth?
Does anyone actually like playing with kids all day? Did I just admit that I’m a terrible person?
Why do I struggle to come up with fun activities for us to do together? Is he already bored of me?
How do other moms make the toddler stage look easy? And how did she get her 2-year-old to sit still for more than five minutes?
Will I become depressed when Jude no longer wants/needs me?
What did I even do with all the free time I had before he was born? And why didn’t I accomplish a thousand times more when I had the chance? (For example, why am I still not fluent in French or excel in sourdough bread baking or have my teacher certification in yoga?)
Should I feel guilty for craving time away from my son—and really enjoying myself when I get it?
What did I do to deserve such a sweet little guy that is fearless and extroverted and basically the funniest kid ever? Where did he even get those personality traits?
But seriously, why does Jude absolutely refuse to listen to me?
Did I give birth to an actual sour patch kid?
Is there something else I could be doing to encourage his curiosity/zeal for life?
If “discipline” does not equal “punishment,” what exactly does it look like to enforce appropriate boundaries for your toddler? And can someone tell me what those appropriate boundaries even are?
Will putting him in timeout scar him for life?
Am I a total pushover?
Does this motherhood thing ever get easier?
Are the rest of my days going to be spent cleaning up an endless array of messes?
Am I completely failing my kid?
How is he growing up so fast?
Is it even possible to love another human being as much as I love Jude?